Welcome to the School of Sentient Birth. You are reading part six of a seven part blog series authored by Swami Jyotirmayananda and originally published in Light of Consciousness Magazine, winter 2008.
My name is Grace Murdock and I'm founder and director of the School of Sentient Birth. As I was retyping this article for the Sentient Birth blog today I noticed myself contracting and questioning some of the content and/or the wording of the content.
It certainly is powerful to observe how much the subject of 'disciplining children' brings up for people, perhaps because the result of how we were disciplined lives somewhere essentially in each of us.
While reading you may encounter an * followed immediately, or shortly after, by an italicized comment. This is simply to introduce a suggestion or inquiry that supports the exploration of Sentient Birth Consciousness.
Education for Your Childs Soul Pt. 6THE SPIRIT OF DISCIPLINE
Practical insight into how to train children must be gradually developed by the parents through experience. There cannot be set laws. Those people who read set laws from research books become like tinny computers, constantly looking into the books to find out exactly how they are going to react to a problem.
*Parents must build up an atmosphere of warmth and love and within that atmosphere firmness. Allow the children to taste the joy of your satisfaction when they have done well in meeting your healthy expectations. However, when they have not done something well they must also taste the bitterness of having made you dissatisfied. They long to please you and learn to enjoy promoting your satisfaction. That sensitive way in which children must be handled is the subject of profound understanding and the art of being firm in a healthy manner requires a special intelligence.
You should not allow the child to have their way all of the time. **You must train and discipline the child and your love for the child should not come in the way of that training. If a child gets into some wrong habits you must discipline them firmly, strongly. Even threats and little pats will do no harm. The children will appreciate your actions in the course of time.
Parents who are afraid that their children will leave them as they grow if they are firmly treated, have not developed deeper love for the children. If you are in a healthy relationship with your children, you will impress upon them the sincerity of your intentions to such an extent that even though you might have been very harsh at times, they will love you immensely.
*I so appreciate the foundation of firmness being rooted in an atmosphere of warmth and love. How did you experience being disciplined as a child? Do you feel that a balance was reached that effectively guided your growth?
**I am aware of my reaction to the 'word' training in regard to raising and parenting children. That being said, I do agree that guiding children requires certain habits to be 'tried on' and put into motion.
As well, I'm not sure how I feel about 'threats' as an aspect of parenting. Can we cultivate agreements and consequence?
What are your thoughts?
Though the School of Sentient Birth and Krmel Mystery School do not subscribe to any one school of thinking, we are seeded in the knowing that "the subject of educating of children is very vital because the future of mankind-culture, tradition, religion, all that is good and sublime--depends upon the way children (and all peoples) are educated."
Join us soon for True Spiritual Education the seventh and last blog post in this seven part series titled Education for Your Child's Soul; a Yogic Perspective.